In Honor of International Bacon Day I Give you Holy Crap!

Always Bacon.

ctbites.com

This is a variation of a recipe found in the Food Network magazine, but with additional ingredients, more detailed instructions, and a dose of snark.

Note:  This is a GPL (general public license) to my recipe, granted under condition that the procedure will be followed more or less to the letter, particularly where noted below.

Ingredients

  • 6 Tbsp dark brown sugar (the darker the better)
  • 1 tsp, rounded, cayenne
  • 1 tsp, rounded, Black pepper
  • 1 tsp, rounded, powdered rosemary
  • .5 tsp cinnamon
  • .5 tsp nutmeg

Recommended but not required:  stone cookie sheet

Procedure

  1. With cookie sheet in oven, pre-heat to 375 degrees.
  2. While pre-heating, mix all ingredients. If you choose to test them, have a beverage nearby. I find that alcohol works admirably. Note:  non-craft beers are unacceptable and will result in a revocation of the license.
  3. Remove cookie sheet, place bacon on cookie sheet.
    1. Do NOT add dry mix to bacon yet.
    2. Ensure bacon does not overlap. If that means you have leftover bacon that does not cook in this batch, so be it. Don’t compromise quality just because you’re lazy. Disobeying this instruction will result in a revocation of the license.
  4. Return cookie sheet with bacon to oven. Cook for 22 minutes.
  5. Using a heavy duty oven mitt (a mere Ove Glove won’t do, but can be used in conjunction with other gloves), remove cookie sheet from oven and drain grease into sink. You don’t have to be perfect here, but let’s get rid as much of the grease as is reasonable.
  6. Using fork, flip the individual bacon slices. This is a pain in the tukus, but must be done.
  7. Liberally sprinkle about half of the dry mixture across the bacon. Type A personalities will want to divide the mixture evenly ahead of time.
  8. Return cookie sheet to oven, cook for 10 minutes.
  9. Using a heavy duty oven mitt, remove cookie sheet from oven. No need to drain.
  10. Using fork, flip the individual bacon slices again.
  11. Liberally sprinkle the rest of the dry mixture across bacon.
  12. Return cookie sheet to oven, cook until done.
  13. Remove cookie sheet from oven, let rest for 1-5 minutes, then transfer bacon to paper towels to drain and complete cooling.

Yield:  ~12 slices.

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